Monday, 29 October 2012

Entertainment stuff from the week 22-28/10/12

Well, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, guys and gals, mammals and reptoids, and assorted others; i've had a fantastic week.

My parents went on holiday, on Monday, so i've been living in temporary bliss, LOL.
It's all over, now, however, but i'm not letting that stop me... on with the fun!

------------------------------------------------- contemporary stuff

'Scientists unlock chemical processes behind argyria, silver-related skin condition'
In case you're not aware of Argyria - you should be. It's caused by the superstitious consumption of colloidal silver, while thinking it to be a form of medicine - yes, it's quackery - and it leaves you looking thoroughly smurfy!

The Hamster Wheel - Alarming New Trends In The Media

Most Offensive Halloween Costume? It certainly ranks as one of the most hilarious!

Illusion: Eyes facing right - eyes facing left?

An amazing tunnel illusion:

------------------------------------------------- 'of the week's

Quote Of The Week: "Newton said "If i've seen so far, it's because i've stood on the shoulders of giants". Actually, if you've seen so far, it's because you've stood on a huge pyramid made of dwarves" - Ben Goldacre
(Speaking about how Science builds on past achievements - some big, many small)

Weird Drink Name Of The Week: Ginger NigNogg

Sensible-but-unused Words Of The Week: 'Sunsight' and 'Sunclipse'
(Suggested by Buckminster Fuller, due to 'sunrise' and 'sunset' being erroneous - the sun does not rise nor set - the rotation of the Earth creates the illusion that it does)

Motto Of The Week: "Quis Paget Entrat"
("Who pays gets in" - the motto of a parody school in 'Private Eye')

Advice Of The Week: Don't listen to comedy songs on your iPod, while walking in public. I looked a right proper twat, laughing aloud to Captain Dinosaur, in town!

------------------------------------------------- other stuff

Rudest mythical place name: 'Mel's Hole'

This seagull's such a poser, LOL - has to get his face on camera, even if it's full of stolen food!

...and, he's right outside a police station. That bird's got balls... though they seem quite well concealed :P

A blasphemous LOL that would warm David Icke's cockles :D

A joke:

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the
lobby discussing their recent tournament victories...

After about an hour,the manager came out of the office and asked them to

"But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"Because," he said, "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

{Oh, gawd - that joke's reminded me that Xmas/Winterval's less than two months away! Eek...}


If advertisers took their slogans from famous brands, and then applied them to condom packages, this is what they would look like:

There are so many weird products on this site :D

And to finish - another joke....

A man with a winking problem is applying for a position as a sales representative for a large firm.

The interviewer looks over his papers and says, "This is phenomenal. You've graduated from the best schools; your recommendations are wonderful, and your experience is unparalleled - normally, we'd hire you without a second thought.
However, a sales representative has a highly visible position, and we're afraid that your constant winking will scare off potential customers. I'm sorry.... we can't hire you."

"But wait," the man says. "If I take two aspirin, I'll stop winking!"

"Really? Great! Show me!"

So the applicant reaches into his jacket pocket and begins pulling out all sorts of condoms: red condoms, blue condoms, ribbed condoms, flavoured condoms; finally, at the bottom, he finds a packet of aspirin. He tears it open, swallows the pills, and stops winking.

"Well," said the interviewer, "that's all well and good, but this is a respectable company, and we will not have our employees womanising all over the country!"

"Womanising? What do you mean? I'm a happily married man!"

"Well then, how do you explain all these condoms?"

"Oh, that," he sighed. "Have you ever walked into a pharmacy, winking, and asked for aspirin?"

...and some lovely, dirty jokes, from Lizzy the Lezzy:

"if people winked in real life as much as they do in messages & comments, the world would be a really, really creepy place ;) "

"Are you my homework?...

"You remind me of my big toe...

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